Today's the day!

Barney is coming for a sleepover, with potential for staying as a foster.

They've met twice, all positive. I'm planning to take Bug for a walk this am with Fred and then drive up to take Barney for a walk before driving him back to ours. Me and OH are then going to meet at the lake with both dogs and complete the 5 mile walk around with both dogs on leads. Hopefully then both will be tired and we will bring them into the house. Planning to let settle and then Aseperate and give them dinner (they've got trotters tonight) and then bring back together for a chilled evening.

I've already picked up all toys/bones/chews and they have 2 beds and a mega comfy crate between them, so can have their space when they want it. Any other thoughts?

Oh Rachel I'm so excited for you. Sounds like you have everything covered. Really hope you all have a lovely day!

Any other thoughts? Yes, don't stress and have fun!

Be good dogs, Barns and Bug.

I was just going to ask you if you had the sleepover after yay hope it goes really well for you

Eeeep exciting Rach I hope all goes well

Good luck, hope all goes well.

Best of luck

Can't wait to hear how they get in Rachel, only thing I would add is to have fun like Liz says

fingers and paws crossed here for you Rach

Hope all goes well rachel bug barney and the o.h

Well! He's lovely, a proper little character. He travelled perfectly in the car, sat backwards looking out of the back window for most of the journey took him and Bug for a long walk - they ignored each other for most of it to be honest!

Got home and kept them on lead while he explored the house/garden. Think he was a bit over stimulated and started to get quite full on/mouthy and trying to hump Bug, which she made clear she was unhappy with. He was really struggling to settle, so as he's crate trained we crated him with a kong. He had that and fell asleep for an hour or so, while Bug worked him out from afar and occasionally approached to sniff and then run off again.

After both were chilled and settled we opened the crate door, and he came out and had a wander around and then lay on the floor by Bug's bed. She then licked his face/ears for AGES and wagged her tail furiously throughout, which he just sat and accepted bless him! They're now both fast asleep next to each other on the sofa! Overall, I would say a successful first sleepover.

Aw bless them! I can just picture the kisses and tails wagging glad it's gone well for u all

Wow... That sounds fantastic Rachel. Sounds like Bug might well have found a new playmate

Oh fantastic!!!! Well done x

Excellent news

hehe! great stuff!

Thanks guys! I'm working at the kennels today, so going to take him back up with me for the day while Martyn is with Bug. He was quiet and slept happily in his crate all night, very happy to see myself and Martyn this morning.

Greeted Bug well and tried to get them to go for a wee seperately but they went together. They were fine for a while just pottering around while I was tidying up, but as soon as I turned my back to put something away they erupted, no injuries and stopped as soon as I shouted, but lots of noise. Sounded like Bug, think she was doing her silly starey behaviour and it got tense. We're going to walk them together this evening and then have the whole weekend to settle them before Martyn is at work on Monday. Fingers crossed!

Rachel33 wrote:Thanks guys! I'm working at the kennels today, so going to take him back up with me for the day while Martyn is with Bug.

'For the day' - does that mean he's coming home again afterwards? Are you going to try the foster?

It does he has coped so well, and I think with time they could be a good pair! He's a really lovely boy!

So happy for you all Rachel. He sounds absoutely lovely- so glad you all had a great sleepover!

Aww excellent hopefully will become a permenant thing paws crossed for u all .

that's great super happy for you

Yay glad all went well Rach

I would have been surprised if they hadn't had a minor spat at some stage but sounds like you had that one sorted real quick

It's funny how you kinda get that feeling that they'll just settle into a routine and be fine together

Barney and bug... definitely has a good ring to it
Good luck Rach xx

Second evening has been a success wanted to play on their way, but was strict muma and didn't allow just yet. Same routine as last night really, both have ignored each other in the house this eve. Sleeping near each other but avoiding interaction. Both have been brought up without other dogs and are fairly insecure/people oriented. Keeping an eye on this, but Barney bonded really closely with a female collie cross in kennels, so I'm hoping with time they will make friends

Sounds like you're getting the balance just right, Rach. I have every confidence this will work. But my fingers are still very tightly crossed, you can't have too many positive thoughts on your side, can you?

Thanks Liz! Really appreciated. I'm a stressy person anyway, but I forgot quite how stressful it is integrating two bull breeds!! But he has been a gem and he's trying so hard to fit in and find his feet, he's just a little worrier and spending a lot of time pacing/whining Heading out for a 7 mile trek in a short while, so hopefully will get some energy out of them!

Sounds like a good start and hope the walk helped.

He soon settled after his big walk and had a frozen long in his crate. He's really well behaved - travels well, seems to know a few commands, is okay when left for short periods, house trained and not destructive. I'm unsure of what to make of his and Bug really.. They're just completely ignoring/avoiding each other! They are happy to share a space I.E sofa at either end while we're chilling in the evening - but just seem to have no interest in interacting! They do both tense up when walking past each other, which I'm slightly concerned about? Bug attempted to play with him on their walk, but I don't think they've built up enough of a bond to play properly yet and as soon as he tried to chase her she snapped at him, so we put both back on short leads and they settled down. Can't figure out which way this is gonna go! Hoping the tension disperses rather than grows!

It's still very early days. I think the main thing for me is that you've not had any adverse reactions yet, so no instant dislike stuff or Bug feeling her home's been invaded.

I guess I'd expect staffies to want to play, but some dogs just rub along more quietly but can still build up a bond. We always thought our retriever and lurcher, years back, didn't much care for one another until Mung went in for x-rays and Harley sat by the door waiting for him, then sat next to him as he got over the anesthetic.

Keep your eyes open just in case there is any testing as they get used to each other, I guess that's the little warning bell that's tinkling in the back of my mind, but otherwise just keep going and see what develops.

Absolutely.. You're right! I think I'm just comparing it to her relationship with Max/Fred where they've had an instant love/play/snuggle relationship. She's a very playful dog so I assumed it would be all play and we'd have to be curbig that, but they're just both more interested in us really at the moment.

Bless them, that's lovely! Were they different once he had recovered or did their relationship revert back to indifference? it's certainly interesting to see the different dynamics/bonds that dogs can have.

That's the key to it, plenty of time and making sure that both them know who is really the boss, you. Nothing too exciting around them until outside where they can be free to go where they want to express their feelings rather than blasting them on each other. Also try to treat yourself a bit more too to bring down your own stress levels as they will be sensitive to that too. A beautiful thing to do though, not jealous at all.

That's the plan - trying to keep boundaries firm and all time inside low key and letting out into the garden one by one. They're fine outside if one is on lead and one has space, but if both are running at the same time they get overstimulated and then get stroppy and clash.

Yes, for sure! If I'm feeling tense I'm crating one with a long to give us all a break, or bringing one upstairs while my OH is downstairs. On my own from tomorrow though! Just trying to figure out when will be the time for them to bond - as I'll probably walk seperately when on my own (which I thought would be the main bonding time) and they're growling when either initiates interaction in house. I suppose just being in each others space will teach them about each other, by watching and learning.

One day of not much bonding is probably not a bad thing. Don't forget how pressure to do something can had an adverse effect sometimes, and also that it's important that they can feel they can be together in the house without being at all close if they don't want to be. They'll know the other is there, even if they're in the furthest possible ends of the house.

Walking them separately can be a plus too. The other will then have alone time, and Barney can get used to being on his own for a bit too.

Sorry, I'm a great silver lining hunter!

Through time perhaos they will bond i hope

You're so wise Liz! I am generally a very positive person, but I'm also very anxiety prone.. Which makes me a little pessimistic at times a bit of a worrier!

Today has been a little better - I think the tension between them is stressing him a little bit and he's started to spin, so after a long walk this morning he hung out in the garage for a few hours with Martyn while Bug stayed in with me while I tidied up. She then came out while I cleaned my car and they had a little play, a few growls (I think her problem is that he's mouthing too hard) but he did back off when they happened so that's a positive. Took them for a lead walk this afternoon around the neighbourhood - we've noticed that he gets very overstimulated when he sees other animals and has a hard time returning to "baseline" resulting in him getting a little manic and pulling like crazy/panting/mouthing the lead - I don't think it's aggression but still something he can't cope with. So will definitely be walking seperately when on my own as I can't imagine Bug's reactivity is going to do him any favours in coping! Martyn's working 7-7 for the next two weeks and away on lodge from Friday-Monday this and next week, so I really am on my own! But I'm feeling more like I can manage. It's going to be hard around work, and I haven't quite figured out the dog walker situation as of yet, but I'd like to give him a safe haven until he can find a home, as he's a wonderful boy!

I'm not sure I've been called wise before!

Do you know what Barney's background is, Rach, or is he a stray? It sounds like he doesn't really know what to do with other dogs. Have you thought about 'watch me' or 'look at that', depending on which you prefer? It might help him have something guided to do.

You are a doing an amazing job already. Yes, it's going to be a testing couple of weeks but I have every confidence you'll do as well as any human could.

Well, I think that you are!

All of the info that Ruth was given; he was in the garden of a guys house and a member of public commented on what a nice dog he was, the current owner then gave him to that member of public saying that he didn't want him anymore - he then kept him for 2 weeks before taking him to the vets for destruction, but didn't really give any reason other than not wanting him anymore either. According the one of the owners, he had 3 homes previously to his. So Ruth's was his 6th, and we are his 7th. At Ruth's he was paired with a young female collie cross for exercise, and bonded with her well and would play etc. He was unsure around the bigger, more boisterous dogs but wasn't aggressive, just seemed worried really.

His default is to sit down whenever we stop moving, and he's foodie so will happily sit and wait for a treat while another dog passes - it just seems to send him into overdrive afterwards and he gets a little manic. As you've said, I think it's just inexperience/not knowing, and Bug isn't particularly experienced too so neither one has someone to learn from.. Where as Bug's other friend's all have lots of socializing experience and she lets them take the lead! He watches everything that you do, and so so wants to get it right, he's a really sweet boy.

Oh yes, of course I knew his history. Peanut memory.

Ah bless poor barney

Walked seperately today and he was an absolute gem! No reactivity at all walking past dogs, ignored other dogs in the field and just wanted to play ball really - though was a little possessive of the ball. He walked well on the lead and came back as soon as called, kept close and is really responsive. Think he's going to make somebody a fab friend.

Had another squabble with him and bug this morning - she was sunbathing and he went over to sniff, she stood up - he put his head over her neck and she snapped at him. He backed off but they've been tense again ever since, so have seperate them with a raw chew each to give them a break.

Ah i really hope him and Bug can sort it out between them. It's only been a short time and these things do take time sometimes. Glad to hear he is walking brilliantly, he sounds like such a little star!

Sounds like he's going to make an ideal family addition. I think both are doing really well considering the short amount of time they've been together Rachel

I can't believe how fast he's settled into the house/with us, he's a fast learner and seems really comfortable with the general running of the house/routine. He's a cracking little dog, proper little staffie!

It's always gobsmacking how quickly dogs learn the ropes, isn't it? How's the tension now, eased off I hope?

Indeed! I suppose he's gotten used to it, poor boy! Being moved around every few months If the Bug issue wasn't present, you would think he had been here forever. Such a clever little chap!

They're just avoiding really Liz, seem to tense and give each other a wide berth when passing. Even when we're not interacting with them (sat reading etc) they go to seperate ends of the room and wait until we're interacting again. He sleeps in his crate at night, I let him out in the morning and they go their seperate ways! They will tolerate each other, but have absolutely no interest in interaction, other than the mounting/head over shoulder spat we had yesterday that's all there has been in the last 24 hours!

Id say its a well done to both dogs id actually like to hope they will settle and get used to one another but it may take months. I do hope in the time you have barney bug and him will become great friends.

Definitely Crystal. They're both doing really well singularly, and i'm making sure each has seperate time with us, Martyn's been taking Barney out to play in the garden with his toys in the evening when he's home too, and I play with Bug indoors. Walked Barney through the park today and he just toddled along - so different to Bug who stares at everything that moves and goes from 0-100 at the sight of a wheelie bin!! Such a chilled little dude out and about.

The thing with Bug is that she hates tension - and her way to break tension is to mess around/play and this is how she got to know our previous fosters. So I think the fact that he's not welcoming her advances, other than him attempting to hump her/and otherwise completely avoiding is making her uncomfortable and perhaps they're getting bad vibes from eachother? They've both grown up with little socialization/haven't spent a huge amount of dogs before, which may also be a factor, as her other playmates are very well socialized. They aren't seeking out altercations, but if they have to walk past each other they both visibly tense up and if they somehow end up head on they both stare/get on their tip toes. We're just trying to let them go at their own pace/not forcing them together, but interrupting if they're squaring up to each other.

I've given the behaviourist an update, and she has said that she's disappointed (I think she was hoping that we were going to fall in love and adopt) but if we're not hoping to keep him long term that if they don't improve in the next week or so there's not much use making each other uncomfortable, and he may as well come back and live at her house with her group of dogs to get some further socialization. If it was just me it wouldn't be so much of a problem - but I'm going back into education next month and the majority of the work will be on my OH who is not experienced with dogs - plus needing to know that they're going to be safe to handle by the dog walker and my sister, if we're both at work/college. Let's see how the next week goes!

I've not wanted to sound disappointed before, but now the word is out there... That sounds a sensible summary from your behaviourist. I'd agree you need to put a timeframe in place for saying 'this isn't fair on Bug'. Yes, there's Martyn to consider but it can't be easy for Bug. I have to say it sounds like she's being an angel but there's only so much she should be asked to put up with in her own home.

Do you think the humping is purely behavioural, maybe his way of expressing that he doesn't know what to do, or maybe status driven, or could he be a rig? I've not come across one in dogs but they can be quite a problem in horses. Is it worth having him hormone tested?