PLEASE HELP WITH AMAZING STAFFY IN CHESHIRE

Please please can someone help, I'm begging with all my heart.

My gf and I visited Cheshire Dogs Home last Sunday. Always a heart-breaking experience, but even more so this time. There was a Staffy (Benji) sat crying in the corner, looking sheepish. A stray,he'd been there for months. Everyone smiled at him, but continued to walk once they saw that he had an estimated age of 9 (I believe he is quite a bit younger than that).

We couldn't sleep that night thinking of him scared and alone in the cage. The next day we went back to foster him to see how we got on.

I expected him to be fairly subdued and a little docile given his predicted age.....how I was wrong. He was overjoyed to come out of the home and full of energy.

For the last few days he's been nothing short of a pleasure...a truly amazing and beautiful dog.

He's clearly house trained and must originally come from a loving home. He's perfectly obedient - knows to sit, to shake a paw, to lie down, to go to bed etc. He absolutely adores walking and gets very excited when the lead comes out of the cupboard. He's the most loving dog I've ever had the pleasure of being with. When walking he shows zero interest in other dogs - no straining at the lead etc, doesn't so much as look in their direction.

He loves nothing more than human companionship. And here the problem lies.......

My girlfriend and I both work. We have been fortunate over the last few days in that at least one of us has been in the house almost permanently. Whenever we have left him for even a few minutes, he has shown signs of distress by crying and trying to see us.

We realise that once he is fully familiar with his surroundings and has had some time invested in getting him comfortable with being alone for minutes, tens of minutes, an hour and so on, he will adapt and be perfectly fine.

However, we have busy schedules over the coming weeks and simply can't do this. We feel that leaving him in a crate so early on will be too distressing.

Our only option now seems to be to take him back to the dogs home. We can't bear the thought of this. He doesn't deserve to go through that. We've given him a taste of a proper life and will now be taking that away from him.

He'd be perfect for people who are home a lot and are able to walk him.

Please please help. I'm heartbroken for Benji xxx

Hello and welcome to the forum

Firstly, well done for rescuing Benji and giving him a second chance. He was clearly well looked after in his previous home and had lots of love. Going into kennels is so scary for a dog that has come from a home full of love and warmth. You have given him a second chance of happiness.

Its completely normal for a dog to become distressed again once you leave him, he doesn't know what lies ahead so will most probably suffer from separation anxiety. The easiest way to cure this is to leave the house for 5 mins and come back. leave for 10 mins and come back. leave for 15 mins so on and so forth. this way Benji will start to trust you will come back. Leaving clothes with your scent on can be used a comfort, also plenty of stimulation treats such ad frozen stuffed kongs to keep him occupied and take his mind of things. Create a space for him in your home such as a room or a corner and make it all cosy full of scented blankets, toys, treats.

Have you tried a crate already? This is probably resemble the kennels and wont do much good. try it and film him whist your out to see how he reacts ( I set my laptop up in front of it) you might find he is a god send if you leave him out the cage and let him have full run. Better yet, leave the cage door open and make that his cosy place.

There are plenty of dogs that are left along pretty much all day, remember, dogs sleep for nearly 14 hours a day. So don't feel guilty for leaving him whilst your out earning a living. Benji will be warm, have access to food and water and his toys with a roof over his head. that's all they ask for. Maybe theres someone that could pop in for half an hour to let him out for a pee during the day? if not, train him to use puppy pads.

You don't need to take him back to the kennels, there are ways about this. It just takes a little hard work and persistence and everything will be okay. Give him a chance

Also....

- Is he chewing things at home that he shouldn't?
- How much exercise will benji be getting every day?
- How long will benji be left alone for at one time?

You say you have busy schedules over the next few weeks, is this a permanent thing or just for now?

This coming Saturday will be 3 / 4 hours alone. I can't leave him to have the run of the house because his distress will cause damage to the house (and possibly him). He'd have to be in a crate. We walk him morning and evening.

It will just be the odd day where we may have to keep him in the crate for as much as 7 hours.

Makes me so sad.

Thank you so much for your advice

Ok...

How do you know his distress will cause damage? Has he done this before? Have you tried crating him already for short periods of time, does he sleep in it, can you leave it open and encourage him to sleep in it at night so he knows its a safe place? Try and tire him out on his morning walk so hes due to sleep when hes home. 7 hours is a long time without a pee mind. Is there anyone who can let him out? otherwise theyre will be mess to clean up when you get home mind.

Here's my advise based on a similar situation with our recently adopted staffy....

He too suffered from and still does to some extent with separation anxiety.

The following helped out massively...

1) A walk morning and night is not enough for these dogs, they need to let off steam and energy every day - a tired dog is a happy dog and this is cartainly the case for our Scoob. Take him to a field and get him running, chase a thrown ball works. Get him panting.

2) When left alone in an open room, he will bark, whine etc, but when left in his crate, he is quiet and feels safe. I was shocked by how different he was when crated.

3) Leave him with a kong stuffed with peanut butter EVERYTIME you leave him on his own - he will start to associate you leaving with him receiving a nice treat.

4) Never make a huge fuss when leaving or returning, no matter how much you want to. Act normal to show that what has happened is no big deal. They sense these things better than we do.

5) As said, film him when you are out. He may just spend 10 mins stressed out, then might relax and sleep for the rest of the time. He then hears you coming back and starts going crazy again, leaving you to think that he has been like this the whole time (crafty buggers haha).

6) Crate him every single night for bed without fail.

7) On days when someone is at home the whole day, still crate him for a period of time (a couple of hours), just for consistency. Consistency is a huge deal for dogs, without it, they will find it very hard to figure out what is normal.

You've done a good thing rescuing and remember that most staffy's are people dogs and will be like this to some extent - you just need to show them what is normal and that they are loved.

Absolutely fantastic. Thank you so much for this. I'll try!!!!

I know where you're coming from with the age thing. I volunteer at a rescue centre and the oldies are always really hard. We have 2 older staffs in at the moment, Harry is about 10 and poor old Alfie is about 11.

However... we have also just successfully rehomed Merick, who's about 9, so there are happy endings eventually.

Well done you for taking on Benji. You don't need us to tell you that he's much better off with you than he is in kennels, even if to start off with he does get a bit upset when you go out.

I think crate training's a great idea. Do try to get him to love his crate at any opportunity. Feed him in there, scatter some treats around so he spends time snuffling around and finding nice things. You can even sit next to it with him in the giving him a cuddle. To the extent you can, build it up slowly so he's not feeling locked in straight away. I know you've got to be away for a spell this Saturday, but spend time during the rest of the weekend making it super nice for him.

While you're away, I'd also leave the television or a radio (either gentle music or voice) on. That can help some dogs feel less alone. If it's in the evening, leave a light on. Have a close look at how you leave his crate and how it is when you return, you'll see if he's got super distressed. If he does, then you need to take it more slowly.

Another thing to think about for those days when you're away for longer is getting in a dog walker. They can be great for breaking up the day and providing mental as well as physical stimulation, as well of course as giving a chance for a wee.

And any time you feel doubt, remember that his alternative is worse. You are doing a totally brilliant thing and never forget it.

Thank you Liz x

Oh so sad if you cant keep him, I am sure you will try everything you can before that happens , good luck and keep us updated

Good luck and hope things work out for the best

Really great advice from Dan, Liz & Kita. When we first left our Flo home alone our neighbour used to tell us she cried (our next door neighbour is great). It took a while for her to get used to the routine but she did get used to it. We had a few paw prints on the dining table and a few mishaps with her pinching stuff from the kitchen but we grew wise to that.

When she is left now, she is very often in the same place as when we left her or she will search out a nice sunny spot and sleep.

Well done on the rescue and hang on in there, I'm certain things will settle and all be fine

Cant say anything more that has been said, once again fantastic advice. you just have to give it a go, short term pain long term gain. once he gets used to the fact he has a forever home which he loves to be in and you following the advice above he will be one happy dog. nothing is easy with dogs, just takes a bit of time,bonding and mutual trust. Im away with work 10 hours at a time, use my lunch hour to drive 20 mins home, 20 mins with the dogs and 20 mins back to work. run the bejesus out of them each night and weekend and they just sleep. It can be done so never say never

Good luck! Am sure you'll do whatever it takes - for all of you X