Signs of aggression

Hello there I am in desperate need if help I have a 5 year old staff buster which I've had since he was a pup he is a lovely little man and I love him very much the problem is I'm scared if dogs I never wanted a dog for this reason. it was my partners decision to get him and he said it will help with my fear of dogs( we split up 8 months ago ) 6 months ago I was burgaled and I think they have kicked him ( there was a hole in the wall about knee high ) anyway on a number of accasions when someone knocks on the door he has been aggressive to whoever is answering e door he hasn't bite anyone yet but has grazed skin I don't know what to do I think he picks up on my fear an sometimes goes for my feet in the garden aswell he is very affectionate and he seems to know that he has done something wrong he also barks and barks and won't stop until you stroke him I feel like he deserves better and I really do try but I am controlled by my fear I don't know what to do

Hi Claire, I have moved your post to chat :-)
That is a tough one as you are scared of dogs and yes, buster will be picking up on this. How much training have you done with him? When he goes for your feet it's probably just play biting, have a look at this link

http://staffy-bull-terrier.com/stop_your_staffy_puppy_biting

These may also help

http://staffy-bull-terrier.com/dog_body_language

http://staffy-bull-terrier.com/is_my_dog_aggressive

Have a read through and someone will be along soon who can help more x

I'm sorry you have been left in this situation. I don't normally say this but in this situation i think this is a time bomb. You need to bite the bullet and send your boy to a reputable staffy rescue so he can be rehomed. You are totally out of your depth and terrified and it is not only unfair for you but is unfair for the dog as he is constantly on the alert because he picks up on your fear.

Hi Claire.

Can you tell me if you're scared of Buster, or just of other dogs?

I would think that after you being burgled, you are quite naturally scared of the same thing happening, and only time will help you to move on from that. In the meantime you're passing on your fear to Buster. It's incredible how easily they pick up on our moods/feelings. Add to that the disappearance of your other half & you have a rather confused pooch!

Do you feel in yourself that you may be able to overcome your fear with help? Have you been to the doctors to explain that you are suffering from post traumatic stress syndrome after the burglary? It may help in the short term to have some sort of medical help.

If you feel that you can make a go of it, please just say & we'll try & help you every way we can.

Otherwise, please don't just advertise him on the 'free to a good home' sites as they are trawled by nasty people who take on dogs to use as bait dogs for fighting.

I know that buster loves me and he hasn't a ba bone in his body but I am scares of him when he acts up I have been atacked on a number of ocassions by other dogs i feel like I cannot control him he is so loving most of the time just very boystrus . he sits lays gives me his paw and I'm trying to get him to drop he fetches an I'm using two toys to get him to drop I have seeked advice from another site where I was advised to put him to sleep I think tht this is abit extreme they also said that a rescue centre would nt touch him I feel so bad and want to do anything to help him any more advice would be greatly received thank you

Claire12353 wrote:I have seeked advice from another site where I was advised to put him to sleep I think tht this is abit extreme they also said that a rescue centre would nt touch him I feel so bad and want to do anything to help him any more advice would be greatly received thank you

Good grief! That's a bit extreme!

At the moment, it might help to keep a collar on him at home (only when you're there to supervise him) so that you can get hold of him if somebody comes to the door.

If he's aggressive to people then a rescue centre won't take him, but neither should you consider letting him go privately unless you're absolutely confident that the new owners are aware of the aggression & are experienced enough to cope.

Do you want to persevere with him, or do you want to let him go?

I really want to keep him but I'm worried that I'm not being fair on him and he really deserves a better owner

I would not try to rehome him to anyone I didn't know because there are some many cruel people out there how they could use his beautiful creatures for such evil thing turns my stomach

Claire12353 wrote:I really want to keep him but I'm worried that I'm not being fair on him and he really deserves a better owner

If you love him and are prepared to work on this to keep him then he has a very good owner! so don't worry about that x

Claire12353 wrote:I really want to keep him but I'm worried that I'm not being fair on him and he really deserves a better owner

I'm certain that he doesn't think that.

Put aside your fear for a moment & look at things from his perspective (remembering that he can't reason & so can't understand events the way you do). 8 months ago his co-owner - that's the way he'll have seen it - disappeared. He probably misses him & doesn't understand why he's not there any more. Then, 2 months later a stranger comes into your home uninvited, and when he tries to see them off he gets kicked for his trouble. Then, of course, you realise you've been burgled & your world is turned upside down again! Your nervousness, fear and worry will be very easily picked up by him, and he's reacting in the only way he can....he's getting his retaliation in first. He's not going to allow any more strangers to creep up on him & give him a kicking, he's going to tell them in no uncertain terms to sod off! In his own way, he's trying to protect you.

I think that you need to address your own fears & insecurities (understandable as they are) before you can help your dog. My own advice would be to a) go to your doctor & ask for something to help your anxiety which has resulted from the burglary, b) I don't know what your finances are like, and it's none of my business, but if you can afford it, try getting a consultation with an animal behaviourist. They could help you to learn to control your dog, and at the same time lessen your fear.

In the meantime, try introducing a little obedience when anybody comes to the door. If he kicks off, clip his lead on and tell him to sit. You might need to repeat the command several times until you get his attention; a treat might help. Then keep telling him to sit while you open the door. Try to keep yourself calm by deep breathing and pretending to be cheerful!

What sort of exercise do you give him, how many times a day & for how long? What food do you feed him?

There are many many many dogs out there that actually deserve a better home, id wager he isnt one of those. You are just feeling a little unconfident and with good reason, that must have been terrifying for you and him and being afraid of dogs and having a bit of a headstrogn dog sometimes can be a little overwhelming. Have you ever thought about getting a behaviourist in to help you with him? It will give you the confidence with him and teach him at the same time.

Also can i ask the general questions:
is he neutered?
what is he fed?
how long and often is he walked?
Where does he sleep?

He sleeps with me usually right in the bend of my knee I feed him pedigree chum canned food and the same brand mixer I can only take him out when someone is available to come wih me because I'm so scared (I take anxiety tablets ) but have panic attack when were out,constantly looking for other dogs so it's really hard for me although I have a big garden e really enjoys walks and is good as gold apart from the pullin which I don't mind it's other dogs that r off te lead even tho he seems fine I'm am a nightmare I looked into a dog behaviorist called Jason from simply dog behavior(anyone heard of him?) he would come for 2 hours costing £130 which I am happy to pay if anyone thinks this will work but as I am a single mother and money is tight I'm a little worried that it won't work and can afford to waste money but if u think this will work ill call him tomorrow I'm just scare that it won't work that I'm too soft and too scared to change anything I'm always watching the dog whisperer and he makes it look so easy but I have always been extremely scared since being bitten as a teenager in a park

He really needs to have a bit more exercise - 40 minutes or so, twice a day at least. Is there anywhere you can go that is relatively empty of dogs? Even street walking is better than nothing at all.

Pedigree chum isn't a good food, and won't be helping his anxiety/hyperactivity levels. Will your finances stretch to a food like Wainwrights or Fishmongers Finest (both Pets at Home brands)?

Just looked Jason up, and he seems to be quite good.

I'd try to speak to him on the phone first, though, so that he knows exactly what the problems are - you don't want him coming to see you & then saying he can't help because you need something else!

You are neither too soft nor too scared to change! If you're willing to listen to the behaviourist & put his advice into practice you'll be able to change without even realising it.

Oh, and don't take too much notice of the Dog Whisperer! Cesar Milan is a fraud and uses outdated & discredited training methods.

After reading some of the other comment on other posts I'm gonna try my best t walk buster more i can't go usual places parks and canals because of my stupid fear I really hate it but it rules my life poor buster gets to walk around the outside of the park or on the ring road where other dogs won't b off lead

Thank you so much

Claire12353 wrote:After reading some of the other comment on other posts I'm gonna try my best t walk buster more i can't go usual places parks and canals because of my stupid fear I really hate it but it rules my life poor buster gets to walk around the outside of the park or on the ring road where other dogs won't b off lead

That's ok - walking the roads is fine! One step at a time. 

I will change his food if this will help where will I get this from a haven't noticed it in supermarket and I think joinin this forum will help I've felt so ashamed that I can't walk him but feel tht tomorrow mornin I will have these comment s in my ear that buster needs this and I will try my hardest to keep walkin I know it not goin to b easy but I will try my hardest do u think this will help him with the aggression I hope it will i will call Jason and hopefully he can help me I have already spoke to him once and he sai he could help but I find it hard to explain and get all jumbled I didn't tell him about me !!

Claire12353 wrote:I will change his food if this will help where will I get this from a haven't noticed it in supermarket

It's available from the Pets at Home pet stores, either in store if there's one near you, or online.

Claire12353 wrote:I think joinin this forum will help I've felt so ashamed that I can't walk him but feel tht tomorrow mornin I will have these comment s in my ear that buster needs this and I will try my hardest to keep walkin I know it not goin to b easy but I will try my hardest do u think this will help him with the aggression

It will help in as much as exercise will help him wind down & relax a bit more. If that calms him a bit, then you will also calm down a bit, which will help him even more!

Claire12353 wrote:i will call Jason and hopefully he can help me I have already spoke to him once and he sai he could help but I find it hard to explain and get all jumbled I didn't tell him about me !!

You should try and tell him about your anxiety problems & fear of dogs - it'll help him to think about ways of helping you.

I have been emailing the stafford welfare website and someone called Audrey has been mailing me back she appears helpful an has asked for my address to see if someone could pop round an help me I'm new to all this and abit worried t give out my address but don't want t appear rud when someone is tryin to help me does this sound normal ??

Is that Audrey Hubery? If it is, she's a breeder & the secretary (I think) of Stafford Welfare. She has a lot of experience with dogs.

THe address is (email removed) I've never been on a chat forum before yesterday and you hear so many stories about people being gulable ad giving ou info to wrong people I'm writing on my phone so it's hard to work something's out it took me about 3 hour to work out how to post on this website and even then I did it wrong and someone moved it for me will this b safe ??

Is this the website you've been on?

http://www.staffordwelfare.com/groups.aspx

If so, it's a bone fide welfare organisation & they will have you and your dog's best interests at heart.

Thank you yes it is it amazes me how people can put links on like you just did ill email her back thank you

Although this is the person that said he should b put t sleep if this behavior continues she won't send someone to take him will she

Reading some of the posts on here is great I liked the one where you told an owner to sing at the top of her voice I also liked the comment back how do u do that comment in the box thing?

Claire12353 wrote:Thank you yes it is it amazes me how people can put links on like you just did ill email her back thank you

All you need to do is copy (right click & copy) the address at the top of the page when you're on their site & then paste it in your post.

Claire12353 wrote:Although this is the person that said he should b put t sleep if this behavior continues she won't send someone to take him will she

No! She has no authority to take your dog, and I'm surprised that she has sugested him being pts to be honest without actually seeing the situation herself!

Claire12353 wrote:Reading some of the posts on here is great I liked the one where you told an owner to sing at the top of her voice

That's an old one - it's made me look really silly more times than I can say, but if you're nervous then singing disguises it. It also puts other people at ease because it makes them smile!

Claire12353 wrote:I also liked the comment back how do u do that comment in the box thing?

When you see a post you want to quote, just click the 'quote' sign that's at the top & it'll take you to the reply box, with the quote already in there - then just type your reply as usual. Have a practice!

I would not be asking someone from a staffy rescue to come out to me. They may well be intending to come out, assess and fill your head with crap about how he needs rehomed.

Stick to jason the behaviourist. get a dog walker who can walk him for you twice a day and you can go with them if you want and gain your confidence, also i would go to a few classes yourself, confidence classes and such. im the biggest pansy in the world but i have forced myself to do a tonne of things i am too afraid to do and it pays off!!

p.s. singing is my one fav thing in the world for horse riding. i sing, talk, rhyme, mumble, hum. Anything to get my mind of the "omg omg omg omgomgomgomgomgomgomg"

I took buster on a number of 30 min walks over the weekend which he loves I put him in the car so we didn't have t walk anywhere where other dogs could b off lead then parked up and off we went I had music playing and when I started t get anxious I started to sing along and this really helped but he's still getting upset when people come into our house and I'd someone knock at the door he always get there first and barks like nad a wave of fear comes over me but I've been talking to him in a calm voice telling him it's ok calling Jason today hopefully things will improve also looked into a dog walker if I can afford one so feeling positive all thanks to people on here thank u

Please do keep us up to date with how things go - if we can help in any way we will! 

I' came t get some food for buster but this shop is called dogs r us there own brand is super premium is this like the pets at home food is it just the same but different home brands ?

I don't know the make, I'm afraid. Can you give us the ingredients, exactly as they are on the bag?

Some very good advice on this thread and its fantastic that you are putting so much effort it with your fear. alot of people could learn from your example.  
Your not letting your fear hold you back which is the first step to a success story and I applaud you for it.
I think your stronger and more strong willed than you realise, I bet the more you achieve the easier it will get for you.

Composition rice 26%,poultry meat 26%,barley,oats,poultry fat, sugar beet pulp,fish meal,brewers yeast,minerals,vitamins,yucca schidigera extract
Analiytical constituents crude protein 20%,crude oils &fat 8.5%,omega 6 1.83%,crude fibers 4^, crude ash 9% omega 3 0.25%

And thanks Nathan I'm so proud today we went out all day with a little help from my sister she's so care free he looked after buster last year for a few days and said if I'd of been there I would of had heart attack we went t park and briefly met an English bull terrior who had just had pups whilst I stepped away an held my breath the man was lovely he seemed t realize that I was scared and reassured me that his dog Was fine and he had an old staff at home I said that buster is lovely but I'm not too sure what he's really like with other dogs but his tail was wagging and he just seemed t want t play

Bless ya hun. Just remember you have a nanny dog there. He will stick by you through thick and thin and one thing is for sure he will always be there for you and show you love by the bucket loads. When he gets a lil agro just think its for you then reasure him your okay. He'll calm down when he sees you are calm. You feed him, love him and look after him he just wants to make sure your okay. Let him know you are and enjoy each other. Those walks together will do you no end of good as you get to learn each others body language. Best of luck mate were all here for you both if you need us

 thanks again im still trying to workout how to work this site i was using my phone but switched to pc but it wont let me on photobucket because of authentisity cert or something so frustrating

This may help :- https://staffy-bull-terrier.niceboard.com/t12017-how-to-post-a-photos-onto-the-forum

If managed to get em on photo bucket but don't know how to get them on here ??

Claire12353 wrote:If managed to get em on photo bucket but don't know how to get them on here ??

Click on the photo you want to post & you'll see a list of codes on the right hand side once the pic has loaded. Click the bottom (img) one and it should say 'copied' - then just paste here. 

Just seen this thread and Claire I think everyone has given you some great advice. The main thing to remember is that he is your dog and you are his world, he would never do anything to hurt you. In his own misguided way he is probably just trying to protect you and it is the burglary mainly that has upset him so much. They are sensitive dogs! I think a behaviourist is the right way to go and I'm sure it will help you a lot especially with recognising his behaviour.

Please please ask us any questions you have, and if you need any moral support or just someone to moan at we are all here!