Advice please!

Now that I'm sadly on my own with Dre I'm not really confident on letting him play with other dogs that he has not previously met while my partner was here. I am certain he can sense this as when I put him on the lead and hold him back he growls and or barks at the other dog.

Dre has never attacked or fought with another dog before, he loves playing and wrestling around with dogs but it has always been when my partner has been with us. Now that he isn't I don't want to chance it by letting him interact with dogs that we don't know - I've experienced one of my dogs getting attacked and badly hurt before when I was younger and I couldn't do anything to stop it - I know Dre wouldn't do any harm to another dog but I'm so nervous in case it does happen!

It's not fair on Dre when I hold him back or put him on his lead because if he does growl or act aggressive the other dog owner immediately thinks he's a bad natured dog - which is not the case at all. I know this is down to me and my confidence with him, so is there any advice at all to help me overcome this fear?

Thanks, Jade and Dre

I can only give you the benifit of an owner of an abused dog

You know your dog best, read his/her body language when meeting other dogs

Tails, Ears, lips and general stance all give pointers to a dogs happiness with a situation

It's easier if you can test it with owners/dogs you know are bomb proof but failing that you have to talk to the owner of the other dog, express your reservations/fears and be prepared to step in if things go wrong.

Dogs send very subtle signals to each other which we dont always see.

At some point you have to place some trust in your dog and hope he/she rewards you with a positive experiance.

be calm yorself and allow the off lead contact as soon as posible if the signs look good

Simon & The Tedster

I immediately put him on the lead when I see another dog, he will cry and moan because he wants to play but as soon as I put a little tension on to the lead, and the other dog comes near he either puts his back hair up or growls - my only reason for this is he senses I'm nervous therefore wants to protect me. I really do need to put trust in him, thank you!

I have done this with Teddy because I know his past but i think I have done wrong.

Reading his/her body language and allowing him/her to be himself./herself has proved to be positive.

The other owners need to be informed but true dog lovers will see your point of view and be happy to let you test it out.

Mine was used/abused as a bait dog but there are several dogs he knows who I am happy to let him play with off lead.

A lot o this is because I trust him and can read his body language

Simon & The Tedster

You really have to do one of two things. Either you need to get over your anxiety and let him play (perhaps with the least likely to be a problem first to build your confidence), or completely avoid other dogs and come to grips with the fact that Dre will most likely come to not be very dog social at all. I know that is harsh but doing the way you have been will cause more problems because he is learning a behavior. Dogs are creatures of habit.

All of this hinges on the accuracy and interpretation of your statement:

Jade&Dre wrote:Dre has never attacked or fought with another dog before

What you want to do is to evaluate the past so that you can predict the future, right? You want to say 'because he has not attacked in the past, therefore he will not attack in the future'. It would be great to be able to say that. Unfortunately, the [future] is a foreign country; they do things differently there.

It's right to prioritise caution with a staffie (even one with a saintly past) because if they do get their jaws round some forbidden third party, then the results range between embarrassing at one end of the scale to prosecution-worthy at the other. While this applies to all dogs (and many are more likely to nip than staffies), as has often been noted, the staffie bite is an awesome phenomenon. Their breeding has enabled them to bite, hold and shake to perfection. As for the strength of the bite, that's why everyone else out there plays with skimpy tennis balls that last forever, while Doug and me have to have rock solid rubber things that last less than a week.

It's responsible dog-ownership to be wondering how much freedom to give Dre - especially since you and he are in a new situation. I wouldnt give you a categorical answer either way, but just suggest that you give it time to know your dog (and he you) and to observe his body-language. Better to allow any lack of confidence to quietly build and be justified (both ways), rather than to be over-confident and risk a big setback. In the meantime, walks at unpopular times of day (avoiding the early morning and late afternoon rush) can sometimes mean you meet very few other dogs and everyone can be calm. So my (humble) advice is: to give it time and to think about timing.

What about getting a long training line and letting him play on that at first to build your confidence? You can let it trail on the floor so it doesn't get tangled but you may feel more safe that you can get hold of him if needs be.

Like this

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/DOG-HORSE-TRAINING-LEADS-5FT-10FT-15FT-20FT-25FT-30FT-40FT-50FT-65FT-80FT-100FT-/140987430180#ht_509wt_721

As Saz says a long training lead. He probably is picking up through the lead on you being anxious, and perhaps protecting you since your partner is no longer there.
Just keep socialising him with short intros and walking on, I am sure in time it will get better   

I would also use a long training lead - about 50' long - and then just watch him and his behaviour.

Try to let him interract with dogs you know are bomb proof to start with so that all his experiences are good ones.

Or....yes, I think that's a good idea to use a long lead. But it doesnt necessarily need to be as long as 50' and you dont need to spend good money. I made one out of some rope (with a spare lead fitting on the end) that was only about 2m long. The advantage of this length is that the dog doesnt get it wrapped round his legs (and take an age to untangle) and yet it's still long enough to grab easily - much more easy than getting a finger beneath a collar or harness. It doesnt get in the way if the dog is chasing after balls or generally snuffling about.

Thank you all for your feedback and advice. I will get Dre a longer / extendable lead so he doesn't feel held back but I know I can get him away from anything as I wish. I really do need to work on my confidence around Dre and strange dogs, but I think this will get better and 'back to normal' in time.

yeahbut wrote:Or....yes, I think that's a good idea to use a long lead. But it doesnt necessarily need to be as long as 50' and you dont need to spend good money. I made one out of some rope (with a spare lead fitting on the end) that was only about 2m long. The advantage of this length is that the dog doesnt get it wrapped round his legs (and take an age to untangle) and yet it's still long enough to grab easily - much more easy than getting a finger beneath a collar or harness. It doesnt get in the way if the dog is chasing after balls or generally snuffling about.

2 metres wouldn't be long enough for this case, because a lot of the problem seems to be coming down the lead from Jade! What's needed is a lead that can be just dragged around (with the end always within reach). That way, Jade's confidence will increase as she knows the lead'll always be within reach, and Dre will get to play with other dogs without a lead restricting him, and without feeling Jade's anxiety.

Jade&Dre wrote:Thank you all for your feedback and advice. I will get Dre a longer / extendable lead so he doesn't feel held back but I know I can get him away from anything as I wish. I really do need to work on my confidence around Dre and strange dogs, but I think this will get better and 'back to normal' in time.

Don't use an extendable lead as it'll still mainly be taut. The 50' (or even the 30') leads can be held on to until you are a bit more confident, without your dog knowing you have hold of the end, therefore avoiding transferring your anxiety down the line!

I use a long line and leave it trailing, I have a 50f and 30f   

Caryll wrote:Don't use an extendable lead as it'll still mainly be taut. The 50' (or even the 30') leads can be held on to until you are a bit more confident, without your dog knowing you have hold of the end, therefore avoiding transferring your anxiety down the line!

Oh okay! Thank you very much  . I'll give this a try and let you all know how we both have been getting on.

Look forward to the updates, hope it helps x

It's hard sometimes to relax when you're not sure about a situation. What I've always done (yes, I know it's silly & will make you feel a complete prat, but it works) is sing a really silly, funny song, out loud. Anything that'll make you smile or laugh.

Yes, it's daft, but it really does make you relax & your dog will pick up on that!

Slightly different idea to work alongside the training lines (which are a great way to install confidence in both of you and I totally agree that is the way forward) Have you considered attending a training class or looking into organised walks in your area? The vets may have details of some, but they are great as a refresher and confidence builder, you don't have to have a young dog or a problem dog... sometimes it's just a good idea to go and have fun working around other dogs in a controlled environment. Just a thought and I wish you both the best of luck.