Help - our staffy showing aggression to children

We have a situation which I am looking for advice on.

We have a lovely staffy bitch, Beau who is now 7 years old. She arrived before we had our first daughter 3 years ago. As with many situations like this her life changed dramatically when our little girl arrived.

She is absolulty amazing gentle and kind with adults but she has never really bonded with our daughter even though our little girl has really tried.

Although she seems a bit grumpy we have never had any situations. Until today.

As our little girl was giving Beau a cuddle she snapped, reached around with teeth out and swiped at her. her teeth grazed our daughters face and obvisouly gave her a high shock.

I was standing right above the incident and it was clear that the dog was just trying to get away. As soon as our daughter let go, albeit in tears, the dog ran away.

This puts me in a really tough position. I am extremely close to the dog, she is very very well behaved, fit and healthy. She goes for a big walk with me every morning so we are close. However, we can't have a dog in the house taking a swipe at our little girl and we have a mother child due in June.

In an ideal world I would like our beautiful Beau to end up with a family who have older kids but I know this is easier said than done as there are a lot of staffs looking for homes out there.

I would love to hear from anyone who has been through this.

Thanks!
Tom

Has your daughter and dog lived happily for the initial 3 years?

HI Janey, thanks for your response. Yes they have been fine for the first 3 years, we have always watched them very closely. Usually our dog would just show no interest in our daughter and just walk away if Coco (our little girl) would come over and play. Because of this coco has not showed a huge amount of interest in her. But the two have always been together inside and we always go for walks together so its not like they have been completly seperated either.

Generally dogs instinctively do not like being hugged / squeezed. My 2 yr girl Staffy is hugged daily by my 4 kids, she will put up with it but dosent like it much. My girl knows her place. Myself n my hubby have worked hard to get her to accept these 4 strange humans !

Advice:

Know ur dogs body language. The nose licking, panting with tongue turned up are stress signs.. Leave them be.
Don't let ur child pet/be around ur pooch unsupervised. Toddlers like to grab/pull.

Any dog can snap if put in a stressful situation but it doesn't necessarily mean they are aggressive, like Jackieb says just be a bit more watchful let Beau have her space.

thanks for your help

Maybe come and say hello here

https://staffy-bull-terrier.niceboard.com/f7-new-member-introductions

Try not to be too rash, but I do understand your worry.

I would have thought that your daughter just worried Beau which made her snap, and I am sure it wasn't in a violent fashion. As said all dogs should be supervised with children (my 2 nephews are a pain with mine).

Like the advice given above, darcy doesn't always like to be held, and little ones don't always know when to stop like an adult would, I'd just watch them like a hawk, & let beau have a place to take herself of to if needed hope all goes well

Most dogs snap at kids who are disturbing them. Let your dog come to your daughter, not the other way around.

some dogs dont like to be restricted which is why she may have snapped. there is no reason to think about getting rid of the dog. if she really wanted to hurt the outcome would have been very different.
I understand your concern but please understand that even a leaded dog will react very different to a situation than it would off lead.
the dog simply wanted to get away from a situation it didnt like, and now you know that situation its up to you to educate and prevent it happening again.
Its prob the biggest reason why people say never leave a small child alone with a dog as they may just find that trigger in a dog to cause it to snap.
thankfully you were there and could if needed stop any escalation, and now you have seen the breaking point it shouldnt be hard to stop it happening again.

I think before you do anything you may later regret, try to remember that if your dog had really wanted to hurt your child she could have done, very easily. The 'swipe' was a warning that she wasn't happy with what your daughter was doing.

I take it the skin wasn't broken or marked?

It could be that she was never properly introduced to your daughter when she was born, and so never really bonded with her. Do you think your daughter is old enough to understand that she must give Beau her space? She should be told that she can stroke her gently (and maybe give her a couple of treats each time), but mustn't cuddle her - she doesn't like it.

I would say that, as long as Beau is healthy & not in any pain from bumps or other injuries, she just wasn't in the mood to be cuddled and told Coco in the only way she knew how.

This may sound bizarre but have untried bonding with both your daughter and your dog at the same time? Watching tv for example cuddling daughter on one side and dog on the other? I always think dogs are very sensitive to non verbal messages like this but I have no idea if this would help. I've tried similar with my dog and new people just to " settle" the atmosphere and are both humans and dogs relax!

I understand your concerns, though. Let us know what happens.

Some dogs don't like being hugged. In the dog world, hugging is a sign of dominance, so a lot of dogs will tolerate it from humans, even like it, because we're not dogs, but some will still be uncomfortable with it. Course it must have been a big shock and a worry, but I wouldn't consider rehoming her because of it; it isn't aggression, it's a warning. Dogs can't express their feelings in words, they have to rely on body language (which isn't noticed by us sometimes) and actions. Is there any way you could help her get involved in training or feeding her? I know your daughter's very young so it wouldn't be much, but even just a tiny bit here and there if possible?

Thanks everyone very much for the advice.
At the time it was a real shock but in hindsight I can see exactly why it happened. She snapped and wanted to be free'd. I saw it coming and was just about to seperate them and get my girl to stop. Squarly putting myself to blame for not recognising my dogs comfort zone had been breached.

Sadly it all happened too fast and when she snapped with her teeth out she did connect with Coco's face and as a result scratch marks from her teeth appeared down one side of her face. They bumped out and were red so did not look good! (we called NHS direct immediately, no breakage of skin so advised to keep an eye on it, now it has almost completly gone down)

This is what was so alarming! BUT I agree with your earlier comments, had she really wanted to hurt her it wouldve gone a lot further. She immediately ran off which tells me she was just trying to escape but sadly snapped a bit too aggressively.

I am of the mind that this is a warning and we need to be more aware of our dog's comfort zone for the future. My wife on the other hand see's the situation very differently. Had there not been contact made with teeth and face I think she (my wife) would be a lot more understanding. But in her mind a line has been crossed which is difficult for me to argue with. I completely see her point but I don'[t want to re-home our lovely staffy.

Anyway, thanks again for allowing me to get this off my chest and hear your thoughts!!

If she hasn't bonded very much with your daughter, I think she probably didn't realise she'd have done that much damage. Loki has terrible bite inhibition, he always accidentally hurts me even taking a treat from my hand, so I think for her part, that really was an accident. I understand it must be scary for your wife too, but hopefully you can explain it to her that this doesn't make her dangerous (any dog is capable of doing this, because it's one of the few ways they can let us know they're uncomfortable) and all that's needed is to get your daughter as involved in training or feeding her as possible, and to watch her body language.

http://staffy-bull-terrier.com/dog_body_language

have you had her checked over by the vet to make sure there is nothing troubling her. It does sound like a clear warning for me an one where your daughter should be getting a little coaching in the situation. some gentle meetings stroking and your daughter handing out a few treats would help the situation along with much closer supervision pre empting situations before they happen

I totally understand your worries and as you are doing always supervise your daughter and Beau, take it slowly with training as well. I think Caryll and Tara said the same but depending on how Beau is could you incorporate a little training with her and your daughter, like get your daughter to ask her to sit and give a treat. Maybe that would help to build a bond and Beau would feel more positive. Always supervise and only do it if you think Beau feel willing... Get your daughter involved in the care of Beau, like feeding and maybe going for a short walk. Keep us updated and don't give up it will come right.

Awe . Such a shame this happened. I did have a neighbour once tho, that had a dog that didn't like children at all. However her rather large family were always brining their children over. So they just used very tight supervision. He did (in fairness) give warning shots, and it never got nasty enough for anyone to be truly hurt.

I hope that this all resolves itself. It must be such a worry .

Have you considered a private dog trainer? I've heard they can work miracles with all sorts of problems.

Good luck .

Some advice, don't let your girl be to in the dogs face, for example grabbing the dog, hugging the dog or make the dog feel like it can't move in a way, because if the dog feels that its trapped then the only way for it to get away in his mind is either to bite, growl or bark...

Also, if you feel comfortable with telling your little girl to just get some treats, without going to close to the dog, just sit down on the and just call the dog to her and give the dog some treats... This will make your dog realise that your little girl is a good thing to be around as it will get some treats, also letting your little girl play with the dog but again without being in the dogs face you want the dog to come to her not her going towards the dog, I hope this makes sense, for example get a ball call the dog towards her and just throw it

I hope this works, my dog loves children but he doesn't like it when they come towards him and start grabbing him or cuddling him to much