My own rant...

I'm a bit aggrivated by my inlaws. It appears that they want to believe media hype over evidence. We have now had two members of our immediate family tell us they were uncomfortable coming over to our house because Monte is a staffy (they call it clearing the air). Perhaps I should be happy... However, I am more irritated they are willing to fall for stupid media hype rather than listen to the good qualities of the breed. Additionally, it appears that they are questioning our decision because they think we are putting our kids at risk. It makes me so mad! Both mentioned that because my dog is in such good shape and really strong, that is one reason they are uncomfortable. Would they rather I had a sickly dog that got no excersise?

I told them in my most kind way to bug off. And no, I don't plan on crating him every time they want to come over. If they don't want to come over, fine with me! I have even had our vet and half a dozen other vets/trainers agree with me that they are actually one of the best dogs to have with a family, but that doesn't seem to mean anything to these #$%@ers.

Wow, having a place to say all this makes me much happier. I probably made them mad last night by ranting on fb... my wife was complaining about it an posting positive breed information and I couldn't help posting: "Wait till the haters show up with "stats." Don't know if they know anybody who has been attacked by every dog of any breed but there is always a first. I say muzzle all white males, get rid of any animal with teeth and we can all be girlie fish. ok?" - they didn't respond. Maybe I won't have to have any additional conversation with them?

Since having Moo I have a new niece (my brother and wife) and 2 new nephews (sister) bro lives in Wales and sister in Cornwall. Way away but lovely places.

Funnily enough niether have anything to do with me. Bros niece is elergic to dogs (after only a few months so not sure how they no) and sister, well, its a staff. Sigh, she is my baby why can't they accept that and she isn't gonna eat them.

Sadly our family was very split and me having a dog has split them more so Xx

It seems a silly thing to split a family, sadly. Yeah, I don't think you can know after a couple months what the baby is allergic to. Funny enough, my nieces really like Monte. It is their dad that has the issue. Too bad they are going to probably grow up fearing dogs like their parents. Missing out on one of lifes great joys.

Totally agree. I just hope that when my eldist nephew (my first one to my sister Noah) is old enough, he'll want to visit aunty Janey, the one with the dog I really hope so anyhoos Xx

Makes me sad I don't know my family because my dog gets in the way. Never had dogs in our family so Moo is the first and a scary Staff

my brother doesnt liek he breed but thats ok i never see him anyway. my sister brings her kids and so do friends and all he does is give them a severe licking. especialy babies cos they have dummies and taste of yoghurt.
my mum at least has been to see lemmy and has been posotive about them now that she has seen one for herself. before lemmy she didnt liek them and said they should be banned now she has changed her mind. she just loves sitting with him to cuddle

I've been really lucky. My brother has a staffy x red heeler (the MOST hyperactive dog ever!) and when we told our families we were getting Vlad, they were really good! My husband's family live in the UK and they owned an English Bull Terrier amongst many other animals, so they were really supportive too! He gets lots of love from everyone. I have a teenage brother and sister and when they are here, they are constantly picking him up for cuddles, taking him outside to play and run around. All of our friends (2 have staffs) including the ones with children, come over all the time, and Vlad loves it! They run him ragged. He seems to know he can't jump up on children. I have only had one person (a stranger I was chatting to) ask me what kind of dog we have, and when I said a Staffordshire, he just went "Oh" and changed the subject. I am really sorry your family are not happy. It shows how powerful the media is, even when it is incorrect!

I really dislike the media as well. We don't have any issues but sorry to hear that you do.

When my boyfriends sister starting going off about how she supports BSL, I posted an extensive essay in the notes section on Facebook about why BSL is wrong. I was sure to mention the American Temperament Test Society's Statistics for the APBT, the AMStaff, the SBT and the Cocker Spaniel (her breed of choice) The bullies beat out the cocker...

A couple of cousins are the same. All of a sudden wouldn't come round cos I had a 'vicious' dog. But they soon came around to her. That said, I'm still bitter to be honest. I know I shouldn't be but I despise the ignorance against the breed

Now we also have a cat. One cousin REALLY is allergic. Shucks.........

KerryAnn wrote:A couple of cousins are the same. All of a sudden wouldn't come round cos I had a 'vicious' dog. But they soon came around to her. That said, I'm still bitter to be honest. I know I shouldn't be but I despise the ignorance against the breed

Now we also have a cat. One cousin REALLY is allergic. Shucks.........

Yes, we feel the same. One familiy member responded with "statistics about bites" but said there is nothing we can say to sway them. They are breed biased and that is the way it is with them (paraphrased their statment). It is similar to racism. Not rational, just pure hatred and arrogance. Of course, I am happy to avoid such people anyway. Still ticks me off though...

CatStina wrote:When my boyfriends sister starting going off about how she supports BSL, I posted an extensive essay in the notes section on Facebook about why BSL is wrong. I was sure to mention the American Temperament Test Society's Statistics for the APBT, the AMStaff, the SBT and the Cocker Spaniel (her breed of choice) The bullies beat out the cocker...

Wish there was a dog they liked, but my brother-in-law is the kind of guy who shields his children from any dog anybody is walking down the street even if it is on-leash and despite the breed. Overall he’s an arrogant * to be honest. I can't stand him. My wife is just disappointed with her sister. About a week ago she was saying she had no problem, and that it was only her husband, but now she is claiming that after weeks and day of spending hours and hours poring over "facts," she and her husband feel it is safer to avoid exposing their children to our dog because even though they think it is "highly unlikely" and they have 100% confidence in our abilities as owners, even one bite would be "catastrophic." Uh, whatever. I like the ATTS site as well, but they claim nothing will change their mind. They know everything.

At least I can say I know someone who knows everything (even if they make contradictory statements).

Boy oh boy. I am so lucky then. All our pals love Jethro and Winston..and my mum who is 80..even though she lives in South Australia and we only see her every few years, well she thinks the sun shines out of Jethro's backside.. ( Well.. it does..doesn't it?? ) She loves him and is always sitting with him. stroking him...she loves staffys!!

I hate the ignorance surrounding this breed and I really feel for you! As I write this, I just had a phone call from my mum 5 minutes ago saying my sister in-law and 5 year old niece want to come and meet Vlad! They have the staffy x red heeler, so know what they're like! My brother won't come and visit often because of my cat. He says he's allergic to them... I hoover and dust ALL the time as I am not a fan of pet hair (or even my own hair!) all over the place (very OCD LOL) and he reckons the cat hair is every where. It really isn't!

When I first got pregnant, our staff Bandit was about 4 years old. The first thing my mum said was "What are you going to do about the dog?". I started going into all the things we would do to introduce Bandit to the baby & make sure he didn't feel left out, and she interrupted me with "No, I mean you are you going to give him to? Are you going to sell him or have him pts?"

She wasn't very happy with my reply.

bbimson wrote: I say muzzle all white males, get rid of any animal with teeth and we can all be girlie fish. ok?" - they didn't respond. Maybe I won't have to have any additional conversation with them?

Oh, I love that! made me smile.

Caryll wrote: "No, I mean you are you going to give him to? Are you going to sell him or have him pts?"

it's so sad some people really think that's what you do.... especially if it's your family!

luckily my family loves dogs,... my parents have 2, my brother just got himself a golden retriever puppy. my parents met Mambo few weeks ago and they loved him, my dad even said he's a bit like Max the boxer, our lovely dog we had for 13 years, he died few years ago. my dad saying that - it was the biggest compliment he could say about Mambo

on the other hand, when i was about 8 we had a dog, cross breed and then my mum had my sister and brother, they were both little babies and the dog kept waking them both up with barking, and we only lived in a small flat at the time so my parents sadly decided to give him away to their friends who had big house with a garden i don't know whether it was good decision, but i remember it was sad for everyone to give him away...

My father in law phoned me a few weeks ago and said he was on his way over to see the children and could I shut Charlie away before he gets here? I asked why, and he said it was because he hadnt been over for a while and he didnt want Charlie attacking him when he tried to play with the kids!!

I was gobsmacked. He's met Charlie before and liked him. i said I wasnt going to shut Charlie away, and he ould be absolutely fine, he would never attack anyone just for trying to play with the kids. FIL said he really would prefer if I shut him in another room while he was there and I said no way and told him that if he wasn't comfortable around Charlie, he should stay away cos its Charlie's home at the endof the day. I was so shocked cos he is a dog lover and as far as I know is not prejudiced towards staffies. Obviously I was wrong cos he has no probs with my sister in laws beagle or any of the other family dogs .....

My family members dont seem to mind milly.Apart from i once over heard my mum saying to my brother.I hope that dog doesnt hurt are leah when it is older she is only tiny it could rip her arms she didnt know that i had heard her to this day

makes me so sad to hear all these stories when we all know what a gorgeous lovable breed they are, its the few bad eggs that wouldnt treat any dog right that gives them this stigma. i am lucky in that close friends/family adore woody and my previous staffy tessa although my strepdad was wary of all dogs once he met Tessa he loved her. my only issues are with work colleagues that sit and talk about staffys (and other similar breeds) with contempt and buying into the media hype - i really have to control how i react or i'd get sacked, funnily enough they all rave about how cute my pictures of Woody are until they find out what breed he is!!

shontelle wrote:My father in law phoned me a few weeks ago and said he was on his way over to see the children and could I shut Charlie away before he gets here? I asked why, and he said it was because he hadnt been over for a while and he didnt want Charlie attacking him when he tried to play with the kids!!

I was gobsmacked. He's met Charlie before and liked him. i said I wasnt going to shut Charlie away, and he ould be absolutely fine, he would never attack anyone just for trying to play with the kids. FIL said he really would prefer if I shut him in another room while he was there and I said no way and told him that if he wasn't comfortable around Charlie, he should stay away cos its Charlie's home at the endof the day. I was so shocked cos he is a dog lover and as far as I know is not prejudiced towards staffies. Obviously I was wrong cos he has no probs with my sister in laws beagle or any of the other family dogs .....

It really blows my mind. They didn't mind my Olde English Bulldogs (guess they never looked up stats there... and they are about twice as big and strong). It never ceases to amaze me how some people will fool you for years, then semingly out of the blue, drop the bomb that they think my dog, who runs from my cat, is a potential threat to their bubble wrapped children (not to mention themselves). I'm done with their silliness.

nicolalouises wrote:makes me so sad to hear all these stories when we all know what a gorgeous lovable breed they are, its the few bad eggs that wouldnt treat any dog right that gives them this stigma. i am lucky in that close friends/family adore woody and my previous staffy tessa although my strepdad was wary of all dogs once he met Tessa he loved her. my only issues are with work colleagues that sit and talk about staffys (and other similar breeds) with contempt and buying into the media hype - i really have to control how i react or i'd get sacked, funnily enough they all rave about how cute my pictures of Woody are until they find out what breed he is!!

That is the point. They don't know what they are talking about or even what breed Woody is! How can they be an authority on the issue if they don't even know what a staffy looks like?

Hmmm, interesting discussion. As a mother with young children I feel I have some say in the exposure my kids have to dogs. If you really want to spend time with me and my children, then respect my instinct regarding my kids safety. I can't imagine for one moment Rascal attacking anyone BUT what if she's having a bad day? feeling unwell? what if a child, not familiar with dogs, does something really childish and silly and frightens Rascal? ANY dog is capable of biting - they have the right to defend themselves afterall - it's instinctive.

You know, it's actually true - if a powerful dog like a Staffy decides to have a go, you're going to get really hurt. With little kids, one mistake, one bad day and they could be disfigured for life, or even lose their life. There is a definite power imbalance here!

When we have friends over, if they're not comfortable around dogs, Rascal goes into another part of the house, or if the weather's ok, she goes outside. I love my friends, my family and my beautiful dog. She doesn't need to be with ppl who exude anxiety in her presence (which puts her off and makes her think she needs to be on "alert") and I would like my friends and family to know I care about them enough to do what I can to make their visit with us enjoyable. Most ppl are happy to say a quick "hello" to Rascal, then off she goes with toys and treats "Win/Win all round I think.

rascal-girl wrote:Hmmm, interesting discussion. As a mother with young children I feel I have some say in the exposure my kids have to dogs. If you really want to spend time with me and my children, then respect my instinct regarding my kids safety. I can't imagine for one moment Rascal attacking anyone BUT what if she's having a bad day? feeling unwell? what if a child, not familiar with dogs, does something really childish and silly and frightens Rascal? ANY dog is capable of biting - they have the right to defend themselves afterall - it's instinctive.

You know, it's actually true - if a powerful dog like a Staffy decides to have a go, you're going to get really hurt. With little kids, one mistake, one bad day and they could be disfigured for life, or even lose their life. There is a definite power imbalance here!

When we have friends over, if they're not comfortable around dogs, Rascal goes into another part of the house, or if the weather's ok, she goes outside. I love my friends, my family and my beautiful dog. She doesn't need to be with ppl who exude anxiety in her presence (which puts her off and makes her think she needs to be on "alert") and I would like my friends and family to know I care about them enough to do what I can to make their visit with us enjoyable. Most ppl are happy to say a quick "hello" to Rascal, then off she goes with toys and treats "Win/Win all round I think.

Good Points! Sometimes it is hard to not react too emotionally, especially when it kind of feels like an attack, but you make an excellent point. Probably much better for the dog not to be exposed to nervious behavior. I only wish it wasn't a breed specific issue with our family.

Thanks Ben Such a shame they have an issue with Staffys I'm happy for Rascal to stay if guests are comfortable with it, however if I owned one of those little snappy breeds I'd prob never let them near our guests! I can't believe people can be so ignorant - there are loads of other breeds that I believe are far more "unpredictable" and likely to snap!

well my neice was terrified of dogs but never once did she
ask me to remove ruby when she n the kids were around
because she knows i would never put her or kids at risk
but ruby sensed her fear and would calmly sit at her feet
to be stroked, so slowly neice became more comfortable with her
her two kids love ruby to bits and a plus for my neice even though she was
scared she never passed that on to the kids. then one day she made a noise
similar to one i use when ruby is allowed to sit on my lap and whoop ruby was
on her lap givving her the staffie slober in no time and neice was fine because
ruby was calm just slobbery lol and when i said no ruby she got straight down
and gave the puppy dog eyes lol neice had her back up in a flash and within
6 weeks had her own puppy not a staff but for my neice a dog is a major step
and as all dog lovers hes her baby lol so there you go ruby turned a scared woman into a dog lover lol the people whisperer eh

Well i don't really talk to much of my family anyway mainly my dad, and grandparents and that's it. I detest my mum and she knows it, anyway she was appalled when we got Harvey and when she came to visit with my younger sister she screamed when harv went near my sister saying don't fuss him keep your hands away he's trying to bite you?!? and so on. Stupid cow.

Anyway when we got Chance she now point blank refuses to come round, which suits me fine

appollo13102000 wrote:well my neice was terrified of dogs but never once did she
ask me to remove ruby when she n the kids were around
because she knows i would never put her or kids at risk
but ruby sensed her fear and would calmly sit at her feet
to be stroked, so slowly neice became more comfortable with her
her two kids love ruby to bits and a plus for my neice even though she was
scared she never passed that on to the kids. then one day she made a noise
similar to one i use when ruby is allowed to sit on my lap and whoop ruby was
on her lap givving her the staffie slober in no time and neice was fine because
ruby was calm just slobbery lol and when i said no ruby she got straight down
and gave the puppy dog eyes lol neice had her back up in a flash and within
6 weeks had her own puppy not a staff but for my neice a dog is a major step
and as all dog lovers hes her baby lol so there you go ruby turned a scared woman into a dog lover lol the people whisperer eh

What a great story! I hope we will eventually get there.

Ella, that is how I feel about one person in our family too. Your situation sounds more extreme though. At least you have two great boys!

We have had the same kind of stuff from family members too. My mam wasn't best pleased that we got a dog at all because she thinks she is the only one capable of looking after a dog. She is the same with my sister who has a huskamute. Yet my parents are out all day at work, leaving their border collie in on his own all day long. However I am out at uni most of the day, but Ian is self employed and now the main carer for our children so is home all day with her (except obviously school pick ups/drop offs). So my mam wasn't best pleased anyway and even more so that we got one of those nasty staffs when we have two young children at home.

However her and my dad came to see us last weekend, and it was the first time they had met Tinkerbell. She obviously got excited and did her usual bouncing about. I did think they would both freak but my mam particularly stayed calm, ignored her and when she had given up jumping she greeted her. However when Harrison walked in to the room and asked my mam to pick him up, she did so but put him down somewhere else incase he got knocked over. I did explain that she doesn't jump on the kids and knows her boundaries but will jump on new people. Not sure she was convinced though. But we did take her for a walk and my mother seemed to enjoy walking her.

My other sister has 3 boys and hates all dogs. She hasn't mentioned anything about Tinkerbell. But the family is due up tomorrow for my daughters birthday party. Tinkerbell will be going in a crate for her own safety as there will be a lot of people in a small house. We just don't want her getting too over excited, stepped on, made a massive fuss off and generally not left alone by everyone. So we will see what my sister says about her, and of she allows her boys to go anywhere near her! My sister that has the huskamute has met her and fallen in love with her, as has her two children and so has my other sister (I have a lot of sisters ) So it is just this one with the cat and dislike of all dogs! That's if she turns up, becuase she hasn't replied to my invitation still!

It is strange how people's perceptions about dogs in general are passed to their children though. The sister, with the huskamute's, children love all dogs no matter what breed, size etc. My friend who will be here tomorrow is the same and also has a 2 year old girl. She has a JRT and also gets the stigma "oh a nasty Jack" yet her daughter loves all dogs. Yet my sister who hates dogs has passed that down to her three boys and 2 of them are scared of all dogs!

bbimson wrote:Ella, that is how I feel about one person in our family too. Your situation sounds more extreme though. At least you have two great boys!

I suppose it is a bit extreme being my mum and that but we've hated each other for years, the boys now are an extra excuse not to come round or us go to theres, as her little fluffy rat goes for them each time she sees them

Minty, what a great story. Hopefully as Rascal grows and matures (she's a VERY bouncy 6mths at the moment!) she will have that effect of people Karen, that's exactly why we usually separate Rascal from guests - we don't want her freaked out by people who are a bit over enthusiastic! Hopefully as she grows her training will "stick" a bit more and we'll be able to trust her not to jump all over everyone. Thankfully we have good friends who are willing to let her "practice" being well behaved around guests

Yes that's exactly what we think. Because we haven't had her long she needs some basic training. Although my parents and a lot of friends are willing to allow her to jump like you saym my sister is nervous around dogs. And I know that when she jumps all over this sister comments will be made about her being a nasty boisterous staffie etc etc. So we would rather that not happen either. At least if she is in the crate in the kitchen (I would give her the free run of the kitchen but then everyone will want to go in to see her) then she is safe and away from all the hussle and bussle!

My niece Paradyse (who’s 2) was petrified of dogs when we first got Frank, a fear both her and her sister Ellie (who’s 3) have gotten from their mother!
Ellie is taken longer to get used to Frank – however as you can see in the photos I posted last night, Paradyse LOVES Frank now, was a case of sitting on the floor with both of them and keeping Frank beside me until he calmed down enough to not be jumping all over Paradyse!! She wants to see him all the time!

Im quite lucky in the respects that I come from a massive family – my dad alone has 12 brothers and sister (he is number 13) and they visit a lot – most of them with young kids or grand kids in tow, and are all happy to be in around Frank apart from one uncle.

He came in last weekend, and Frank was on the floor playing with Paradyse and a few of my little cousin, all under the age of 5, Frank hadn’t even looked up to see my uncle and he went dashing in to the kitchen slamming the child gate behind him – screaming “that vicious dog should be put in a cage while people are in!”

I was furious, I know he is my uncle but Frank is my dog, and that is Franks home, I would never disrespect my uncle by taken Frank to his house, so please show a little respect back – either calmly walk in to my kitchen where Frank cant get to because of the stair gates – or don’t visit!
My Granddad must have noticed this angrier me a little an made a lovely comment about how much of a good dog my boy is and that he is always welcomed at my granddads, then my nieces mother (who is scared of dogs) also said Frank was welcome at hers!

x