I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny.

3 posters

Go down

I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny. Empty I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny.

Post by Guest Wed Apr 20 2011, 02:30

Basic Rules for Dogs



Newspapers: If you have to go to the bathroom while playing in the front yard, always use the newspaper that's placed in the driveway every morning for that purpose.

Visitors: Quickly determine which guest is afraid of dogs. Charge across the room, barking loudly and leap playfully on this person. If the human falls down on the floor and starts crying, lick its face and growl gently to show your concern.

Barking: Because you are a dog, you are expected to bark. So bark--a lot. Your owners will be very happy to hear you protecting their house. Especially late at night while they are sleeping safely in their beds. There is no more secure feeling for a human than to keep waking up in the middle of the night and hearing your protective bark, bark, bark...

Licking: Always take a big drink from your water dish immediately before licking your human. Humans prefer clean tongues. Be ready to fetch your human a towel.

Holes: Rather than digging a big hole in the middle of the yard and upsetting your human, dig a lot of smaller holes all over the yard so they won't notice. If you arrange a little pile of dirt on one side of each hole, maybe they'll think it's gophers. There are never enough holes in the ground. Strive daily to do your part to help correct this problem.

Doors: The area directly in front of a door is always reserved for the family dog to sleep.
The Art of Sniffing: Humans like to be sniffed. Everywhere. It is your duty, as the family dog, to accommodate them.

Dining Etiquette: Always sit under the table at dinner, especially when there are guests, so you can clean up any food that falls on the floor. It's also a good time to practice your sniffing.

Housebreaking: Housebreaking is very important to humans, so break as much of the house as possible.

Going for Walks: Rules of the road: When out for a walk with your master or mistress, never go to the bathroom on your own lawn.

Couches: It is perfectly permissible to lie on the new couch after all your humans have gone to bed.

Playing: If you lose your footing while chasing a ball or stick, use the flower bed to absorb your fall so you don't injure yourself.

Chasing Cats: When chasing cats, make sure you never--quite--catch them. It spoils all the fun.

Chewing: Make a contribution to the fashion industry. ...Eat a shoe.

Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny. Empty Re: I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny.

Post by Guest Wed Apr 20 2011, 04:18

Thanx for sharing.

That bought a smile to my dial, and made me chuckle.

Oh how true

Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny. Empty Re: I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny.

Post by Guest Wed Apr 20 2011, 08:49

Jethro's fav bit was the bit about breaking houses...... over the years he was the King Of Housebreaking! ( also destroying.. chewing.. shredding etc etc.. )

Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny. Empty Re: I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny.

Post by debbiewaterhouse Wed Apr 20 2011, 09:00

that made me smile this morning Smile
debbiewaterhouse
debbiewaterhouse
Staffy-Bull-Terrier Donator
Staffy-Bull-Terrier Donator

Status Status :
Online
Offline

Female
Age : 57
Location : West Yorkshire
Relationship Status : Divorced
Dogs Name(s) : Hollie & Dotts
Dog(s) Ages : 2 1/2 & 5 months
Dog Gender(s) : Females
Join date : 2011-01-18
Support total : 3
Posts : 789

Back to top Go down

I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny. Empty Re: I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny.

Post by janey Wed Apr 20 2011, 09:38

Yep that gave me my morning giggle, and so true Laughing
janey
janey
Staffy-Bull-Terrier VIP Member
Staffy-Bull-Terrier VIP Member

Status Status :
Online
Offline

Female
Age : 40
Location : Surrey
Dogs Name(s) : Moo
Dog(s) Ages : 5ish
Dog Gender(s) : Girly
Join date : 2010-08-28
Support total : 4824
Posts : 56018

Back to top Go down

I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny. Empty Re: I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny.

Post by Guest Wed Apr 20 2011, 10:18

Laughing

Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny. Empty Re: I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny.

Post by Guest Wed Apr 20 2011, 13:15

Very funny and so true!! Laughing

Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny. Empty Re: I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny.

Post by Guest Wed Apr 20 2011, 16:36

Only just seen this - really cheered me up! Laughing

Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny. Empty Re: I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny.

Post by barneynlynn Wed Apr 20 2011, 22:09

Laughing rolling on the floor
barneynlynn
barneynlynn
Super Staffy-bull-terrier Member
Super Staffy-bull-terrier Member

Status Status :
Online
Offline

Female
Dogs Name(s) : Barney
Dog Gender(s) : male
Join date : 2011-02-24
Support total : 0
Posts : 44

Back to top Go down

I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny. Empty Re: I got this off Rescue Ink WebSite Its pretty funny.

Post by Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum