Respect or trust in a relationship?

by Guest on Sat Nov 20, 2010 8:46 pm

I'm on this other forum and we are talking about Jason Manford would you forgive him again. Well anyway I just said that I would if he owed up to it. He was having flings with other women. This is what I put.

I would forgive him as he owned up to it. Me and my OH said one day if this ever happened to us and we came out with it instead of them finding out and hiding it from each other. Then we would stay strong and try and sort our life together. It's all about trust a relationship is. If your having an affair behind there back and you don't own up to it then there is no trust in your relationship whats so ever. Ive bin there done that. It happened to me with my ex. I new he was having an affair with lots of women, I told him to his face. Are you having an affair and he said no and wouldn't owe up to it so our relationship ended. If he said yes i'm sorry then I would of thought about sorting out our relationship out. But he said No. Never mind he's a t**t any way. Ive got a better man now. Better than he ever be and more of a man.

A other member put Have you not just given your oh permission to cheat though??? Cos as long as he owns up to it you will forgive him. it's all about respect not trust, sod the trust they say. Hang on here I thought a relationship is all about trust. Where did the respect come in this. You got to owe your respect before you get any. Am I being just old fashioned here with the trust thing in a relationship.

by **Steve** on Sat Nov 20, 2010 8:51 pm

i think a good relationship need little bit of both Smile

but if they cheat on you it time to call it a day.

by **Mike** on Sat Nov 20, 2010 10:02 pm

If my wife cheated it would be over.....Simples
And if I cheated on her I'd expect her to wrap a frying pan round my head and end it.
I understand what your saying but for example my partner should stand up and say something is wrong long before someone cheats to say they want to work at the relationship, not have a bit of fun first then make an effort.

by **Warren** on Sat Nov 20, 2010 11:29 pm

if it happend to me i would be gutted
i would have to spend money on another bloody freezer grrrrr rolling on the floor

by **Mike** on Sat Nov 20, 2010 11:34 pm

bigwazza wrote:if it happend to me i would be gutted
i would have to spend money on another bloody freezer grrrrr

You should get that extension done......I can't see the new mrs being able to relax in front of the telly with all them freezers in the living room

by Shane on Sun Nov 21, 2010 2:37 am

bigwazza wrote:if it happend to me i would be gutted
i would have to spend money on another bloody freezer grrrrr

you need to start eating whats in you're freezer then maybe you could fit more in rolling on the floor

by shontelle on Sun Nov 21, 2010 8:16 am

I kind of agree with the person on the other forum. You and your oh have a free pass to cheat, as long as you tell each other after. We've had this conversation on another thread and I said that if my husband cheated on me, there's obviously something wrong in our relationship. If you really love yr husband/wife/oh, you wouldnt cheat, there'd be no reason. Everyone else agreed. If my husband cheated, we'd be getting a divorce shortly after. I know what you're saying in a way tho cos i'd feel much worse about it if I had to find out from something else rather than him having the balls to tell me himself. It goes without saying that I would NEVER cheat on my husband. I love him and could never even consider it. I expect the same from him, otherwise, what's the point in our marriage?

by **Caryll** on Sun Nov 21, 2010 9:04 am

Bubbles-mum wrote:[color=black] It's all about trust a relationship is.

But if your OH's cheating, where is the trust? Gone. How can you trust them not to do it again? No matter how hard you try, it'll always be in the background. OH's late home - are you having an affair? OH's on the phone more than usual - are you having an affair? OH does themselves up a bit more than usual - well, you get the idea.

by scott on Sun Nov 21, 2010 9:17 am

think it need both of them to work.....

but as for cheating that be the game killer for me..

and i know id never do it,im to shy really to talk to girls at the best of times.......

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